What Does the Bible Really Teach about Homosexuality - Kevin DeYoung

And Grace Will Lead Me Home: Inclusion and Evangelical Conscience

Enough is enough!

“This is the crisis we’re in: God-light streamed into the world, but men and women everywhere ran for the darkness. They went for the darkness because they were not really interested in pleasing God. Everyone who makes a practice of doing evil, addicted to denial and illusion, hates God-light and won’t come near it, fearing a painful exposure. But anyone working and living in truth and reality welcomes God-light so the work can be seen for the God-work it is.”

John 3:19-21 

It has been said that when the pain or gain is great enough than you get out of your comfort zone and change happens.  I see that the country is in pain and so it is changing.  Look around, there is an uprise of people everywhere asking, pleading, no demanding that there be equality.  Yes black lives matter and they are the ones in an uproar, but to me all lives matter.

Yes all, the ones in jail, the crack heads, the mentally ill, the blacks, whites, mexicans, and any other race.  The lives of those who have dark history, those that make millions, those that are on the streets, straight people, LGBTQ+ people.  Those that have done me wrong, those that have hurt me, those that help me, and those that love me.  You get the point.  I don't need to go on.

I am tired of there being white privilege.  I am tired of there being people prejudged by their skin color, life choices, or sexuality.  I am tired of there being fights for rights.  And I am angry that there is any fight at all.  We are past that in my eyes, but are we?

We should have grown up as a world by now.  What happened that it all went so wrong?  Prejudice running wild.  Racism is a sin problem and choice to be that way.  Holding someone down is not right.

There is going to be change, but at what level?  I still see people not getting it.  I still see people thinking this is just a black thing.  I still see people hate on others who are different or hold a race to just certain jobs or careers.

I don't know what it is like to be another race or transgender or male as I am a white, lesbian woman.  I do know though what it is like to be homeless, not know when your next meal will come, to be spat at for another religion, to be hated on for being a lesbian, to have rights taken away, to not be free.

I stand with my brothers and sisters in Christ that are standing up for human rights to be equal.  Enough is enough!  We must show love to the loveless.  We must be kind when hated.  We must stand for those that can't stand!

So, yes black lives matter, but so do others.  Yes there needs to be equality for all, not just some.  Yes there needs to be a look at how we handle things.  And yes, authorities need to answer and be accountable!

Just so it is clear, more whites are killed by officers, but more so more mentally ill are killed, more trans or others in the LGBTQ+ commit suicide or are killed by officers.  What makes black lives more angered about things is that they are profiled before they even get a chance.  As a white woman, when I am pulled over I am treated with respect and dignity.  But when I walk with a girlfriend holding hands, I have had catcalls and slurs thrown my way.

Enough is enough!  I stand with those oppressed and pray for a day of equality!  

Trans Woman Shuts Down Minister With Research, Notes, And A Highlighter.

Why I chose my LGBTQ daughter over the Evangelical Church | Susan Cottre...

Change is in the air!

Change is in the air!  The first one is that this is no longer just a lesbian blog but moving to a LGBT+ blog!  There will be new authors, videos, and more!  I am so excited for this change!

Another change is there will be a page for churches that are affirming or accepting listed.  This way we can know where to go when visiting or moving to different places.

Keep watch for all the changes!

Lesley

Can you hear me?

Jesus told them, “Go back and tell John what’s going on: The blind see, The lame walk, Lepers are cleansed, The deaf hear, The dead are raised, The wretched of the earth learn that God is on their side. “Is this what you were expecting? Then count yourselves most blessed!”

Matthew 11:4-6

The deaf hear!  As I look at what is going on in our nation, I wonder if the "deaf" hear the cries of the people.  I am not a political person, one to go out and protest, or one to riot.  I am though thinking of my part in things.  I wonder if every person that has been oppressed from race to sexuality got out and stood in front of the white house, what that would do.

I think of Christ and what he would do.  I don't think he would sit quietly and let things happen.  I know he would riot but only destroying what needed to be.  I think this because of him destroying the tax collector booths, he did not destroy the temple, just the injustice of the tax collectors.

I know you know the story but can you just see it?  Here he comes into a temple and sees the injustice so what does he do?  Jesus throws the tables over, sets free the animals, and shouts "Not in my Father's house"

Are not the rioters doing the same?  I get it, innocent people have had damage to their property.  But here they are saying "No more, not in my country!"  There should be no second class citizen.  We should have equality for all!

Mental health should be given to those that need, sexuality should not have to be a coming out story, blacks and other races should not have to live in fear.  I see the differences and am glad for that.  Each person is different.  Each person deserves to strive for the best in life.  Each person deserves a life without fear.

As a white Christian in America, I am privileged to go about life.  Yet as a lesbian, I get shunned for my "lifestyle".  I can't walk hand in hand with a love without catcalling or slurs thrown my way.  I can't walk into a church of Christ and be accepted with a partner for the most part.  I can't show PDA at all without someone saying something.

Some ways we have come a long way, but many areas still need to grow up!  I just pray we learn how to before more lives are taken in some form or fashion.

Faith Unashamed (Acoustic) - openly gay Christian Artist, Shawn Thomas

Torn by Justin Lee

Description from Amazon:  

As a teenager and young man, Justin Lee felt deeply torn. Nicknamed "God Boy" by his peers, he knew that he was called to a life in the evangelical Christian ministry. But Lee harbored a secret: He also knew that he was gay. In this groundbreaking book, Lee recalls the events - his coming out to his parents, his experiences with the "ex-gay" movement, and his in-depth study of the Bible - that led him, eventually, to self-acceptance.

But more than just a memoir, Torn provides insightful, practical guidance for all committed Christians who wonder how to relate to gay friends or family members - or who struggle with their own sexuality. Convinced that "in a culture that sees gays and Christians as enemies, gay Christians are in a unique position to bring peace," Lee demonstrates that people of faith on both sides of the debate can respect, learn from, and love one another.

My thoughts:

I love how easy of read this was.  I could not put it down.  I read it in record time.  I could relate to the story of Justin and at times felt myself saying me too!  I recommend this book to any gay christian out there.  Though there was times that I thought hard about where I stand on things, any great book will make you do this.  I love the ease Justin has on it.  

I love how also he reminds us to walk and act in grace.  So often we forget to.  Overall I give this book a five star rating!

The struggle is real!

When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me.

1 Corinthians 13:11

I did not know of a better scripture for this.I thought there would be one on struggling with the mind.  But this is as close as I could get.  See I am struggling in my mind.  The battle is real.  Am I to live in celibacy for ever or will I find love at my side?

I read so much that my mind is full of questions and not really finding answers.  Is it okay to be in a loving relationship with the same sex?  Or is it not?  I once had a clear view on this.  I thought that I knew where I stood.  I could debunk any scripture and was sure I stood on solid ground.  Now days though, I struggle.

I don't want to live in sin if it is wrong and I don't want to be alone forever.  And then I think is it really that I think it is wrong or do I think dating is wrong for me?  I mean my picker is broken and all past relationships have turned to turmoil.  

I have been in one abusive relationship after another, been taken advantage of, and left at times wondering why.  My heart has been broken so many times, that I wonder if it can take one more.  I am blessed right now and don't want that to end.

I think, though, about when my folks are gone, what will happen to me?  Will the church be there?  Will close friends?  Will I live alone?  Will I make it?  Fear is setting in and I don't like it.  I want know what will happen to me.

God don't let us know the future though, we live in the now.  So why am I worrying through negative meditation?  These are true fears, but that don't mean they have to control me.  One day, maybe, I will know more and state a firm belief, for now I will read and study.

Hate can come through even if in love

Meanwhile, live in such a way that you are a credit to the Message of Christ. Let nothing in your conduct hang on whether I come or not. Your conduct must be the same whether I show up to see things for myself or hear of it from a distance. Stand united, singular in vision, contending for people’s trust in the Message, the good news, not flinching or dodging in the slightest before the opposition. Your courage and unity will show them what they’re up against: defeat for them, victory for you—and both because of God. There’s far more to this life than trusting in Christ. There’s also suffering for him. And the suffering is as much a gift as the trusting. You’re involved in the same kind of struggle you saw me go through, on which you are now getting an updated report in this letter.

Philippians 1:27-30 The Message (MSG)

I am going to rant a second!  Just cause you think that being gay is a switch to turn on or off does not mean it is!  It is not like being fat and choosing to stay that way as it was put to me recently.  It is not like addiction that you manage.  Being gay is embedded into your soul.  Now, do I believe that we choose to act on it?  Yes, but you straight people choose to act on your straightness.  I know that this should not get under my skin but it did.

I wish people would say what they mean and not use stories to say it at times.  I get it, Christ always used a story, but there were times he just frankly stated something.  I guess you can say though that I am hurt that today people still see it as a choice and something that can be prayed away or turned off.

I keep reading the scripture above.  "Your courage and unity will show them what they're up against" sticks out.  Us in the LGBT+ community have to be in unity.  We have to have courage to speak up.  The other part that sticks out is "There’s far more to this life than trusting in Christ. There’s also suffering for him. And the suffering is as much a gift as the trusting."  I know now what it means to suffer in Christ and for Christ.

I suffer at the thought that I will never have a mate to come home to.  I chose this, but don't mean I don't suffer at it.  I suffer when others say you can't be gay and Christian.  I did not choose to gay, but I did choose my Christianity!  Yet some who are make it where I want to rethink this Christian thing.  Then I remember I chose Christ, not people, I chose His love, not others.  

My mind is racing as I type this and there is so much I wish to say.  I just can't get it to slow down enough to get it all out. 

I go to the first verse in the passage above.  "Meanwhile, live in such a way that you are a credit to the Message of Christ"  Am I doing this?  Am I living where Christ is seen first in my life and not my sexuality?  My sexuality, though big to some, is just a small part of my life.  I am also a birth mother, daughter, diagnosed with mental health, alcoholic, mental health peer specialist, and more.  Not one thing defines me, but if one did, I would want it to be Christian. 

I don't know where I stand on some things and I know that is okay.  I know what to do till I do.  I trust God, first and foremost.  I compare things to His word, not just one translation but many.  I study and I learn.

Will I date one day or even shall I say marry another?  I don't know.  Right now celibacy is working and took a load off my mind. I do know that my choices are just that, mine!  I live with the consequences.  Not another pays my debts, except Christ did.  He chose to do so.

Okay, I will step down off my box.... I don't have all the answers, but I do know how to find them when God reveals them to me!

Scripture, Ethics, and the Possibility of Same-Sex Relationships by Karen R. Keen

Scripture, Ethics, and the Possibility of Same-Sex Relationships

by Karen R. Keen

Description

WHEN IT COMES TO SAME-SEX RELATIONSHIPS, this book by Karen Keen contains the most thoughtful, balanced, biblically grounded discussion you’re likely to encounter anywhere. With pastoral sensitivity and respect for biblical authority, Keen breaks through current stalemates in the debate surrounding faith and sexual identity.

The fresh, evenhanded reevaluation of Scripture, Christian tradition, theology, and science in Keen’s Scripture, Ethics, and the Possibility of Same-Sex Relationships will appeal to both traditionalist and progressive church leaders and parishioners, students of ethics and biblical studies, and gay and lesbian people who often feel painfully torn between faith and sexuality.

This is my review of this book.  I really enjoyed it and found much of it very interesting.  Reading the different views and ways of dealing with same-sex relationships.  At first, I thought it was a book that would deter me from being gay or try to talk me out of it, but as I read, no it actually strengthened my relationship to God and secured my feelings.

I will say this, be prepared to look up words as Karen does use some words that are not every day terminology.  I found myself asking google many times what a word meant.  I like to think as myself as well educated, but this book tried that.

I personally recommend this book to any one who is trying to come to terms with either their own sexual identity or someone trying to move from traditional teaching that same-sex relations are wrong to accepting and maybe even affirming.  

I believe in this book so much that I am writing this while I still have yet one chapter to go.  Pick it up today at this link.  Enjoy!

Online Retreats, its a real thing!

This past weekend I was honored to be a part of an online retreat.  With the pandemic going on, we could not meet in person, so the great people of Center Peace, put one out there on zoom.  At first, I was not sure how this would go down, but it was amazing and I came out of it with new friends!

We had some amazing authors in it!  Justin Lee, Karen Keen, Sally Gary, and Matthew Vines!  All who has amazing books.  (I say amazing a lot these days, lol!)  I love how personal they were and hearing their stories.

In the retreat, we all got to share.  And trust me, 30+ people on zoom, it takes a lot to pull that off.  But, zoom has break out rooms!  So we split up in groups of six and shared.  Though this was online, I still feel connected to some and was able to exchange numbers and become friends on Facebook.  I do though miss the in person interactions, the staying up and chatting, the hugs, the wholeness found in an in person retreat, but this was still amazing!  Center Peace really did a great job with it!

I came out of the retreat with a renewed spirit to write here, write on my book, and grow more with God.  I don't know why I set this down, but I do know I will pick it back up again!  I also came out with a spirit of reading.  I have a list now to get read.  I will be posting reviews as I finish them.

I recommend if you can do any retreat or conference with Center Peace to do it!  Their website is www.centerpeace.net!  It is an amazing organization!

The Fear Tactic Against LGBT Community

There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.

1 John 4:18

It is amazing to me how many people think that fear will bring anyone closer to God.  You know how it goes, "Repent or you will go to Hell!"  or "You are an abomination!"  And the list goes on.  People think that they are going to scare you into what they have pictured as the only right way of thinking.

Yes, I believe it is not wrong to be gay, but that doesn't mean that I am going to be cruel or drive fear of someone that believes different than me.  Christ teaches us to love one another.  He did not meet people with fear and hate but love.  Did He ever tell a sinner you are horrible?  No, He showed love and compassion.

When did we get so far from the teachings of Christ and decide we could say who goes to Heaven and who goes to Hell?  I don't remember Christ saying you decide!  No, God is the only judge!  

Book Review: What the Bible Really Says About Homosexuality by Daniel A. Helminiak

Here is what Amazon says about this book: 

Does God's word in the Bible really condemn homosexuality?...... Top scholars--like the late John Boswell of Yale, Daniel Boyarin of Berkeley, Bernadette Brooten of Brandeis, L.William Countryman of the Church Divinity School of the Pacific in Berkeley, Victor P. Furnish of SMU, Saul M. Olyan of Brown and Robin Scruggs of Union Theological Seminary--show that those who perceive Bible passages as condemning homosexuality are being misled by faulty translation and poor interpretation...... Danial A. Helminiak, Ph.D. respected theologian, and Roman Catholic priest explain in a clear fashion the fascinating new insights of these scholars...... The Bible has been used to justify slavery, inquisitions, apartheid and the subjugation of women. Now, in this book which has sold over 100 thousand copies, read what the Bible really says about homosexuality.

Here is what I say about it:

I really enjoyed this book.  It was very informative and had an easy flow about it.  I also like how the author makes notes about each source in the end.  I found myself not wanting to put this book down.  I recommend it to anyone that wants to know more about the Bible and its' views on homosexuality.  Very good book!

You've have no idea how a lesbian feels in a straight setting who don't accept completely!

I am a foreigner to my own family, a stranger to my own mother’s children...

Psalm 69:8

People just assume that there is no emotional recourse from them not accepting a gay person.  They just act as though it is okay.  Well, it's not!  When you are gay, you constantly wonder who will accept you, or at least I do!

You are careful who to let know at church, family gatherings, and at work.  You want to be open and honest about you, but you learn not everyone will accept so you don't say a word.  You don't deny it either, but you don't announce.  When they say when will you find a man, you just laugh and change the subject.  When they talk about dates, you just listen.  When the world is thinking straight, you have to accommodate to them.

There are times I want to say, stop!  I am gay, I won't have a man, I go on dates with a woman, I am gay!  Yet for safety, I don't say a word.  I could lose my job, my church, or family.  I am as out as I can be, but still, I can't just talk about things normally cause than others will react.

I dream of a day when me saying I am with a woman is not a threat to someone.  Why should it be?  It is not affecting them!  Who I date should not be a bad thing.  Yet, let's say at church, I am careful who I let know about dates.  I don't want to be judged and I don't want to hear their comments of condemnation.

So what does this do to a person and their psyche?  Well, it tells them that they are not accepted.  It says there is something wrong with you.  It says you are not wanted.  And we wonder why there is such a high suicide rate in the LGBTQ community, especially among teens!

If you are part of the LGBTQ community, you can't change the straight community.  But if you are part of the straight community you can change it!  Show acceptance and love to start with.  Don't make a big deal if someone is gay.  Be supportive and let them know that they are good people.

How we treat each other today is just saddening.  If we truly cared to follow God's commands, then we know we must love.  Love is an action word.  It means to be kind, be compassionate, be what you want to have back to you!  It means accept!  If we just learned to accept, we would find the world a lot better of a place.

What is it like being in the Church of Christ and a lesbian?

I think the questions I get asked the most is: Why the Church of Christ?  Are there not more accepting churches out there?  Won't I feel more acceptance at one of them?  Doesn't the Church of Christ condemn being gay? How do you deal with that?

These are good questions.  Let's start with the why question.  Simple, I grew up in the Church of Christ.  It is what I know and feels the most comfortable at.  It also helps that the preacher is a life long friend.  The Church of Christ has the values I want in my life, beliefs that I hold dear, and way of doing things that feel like home.  It is my spiritual home.

Yes, there are more churches out there that are more accepting of gays and lesbians, but I find them to be more about "look at how we accept you" than about being on the topic of God and Christ.  I want to go to church and feel like I have worshipped and got a lesson on God and not just told of how accepting of gays a church is.  This is one reason I love the Church of Christ, it is not pushing an agenda, just talking about God and all about Christianity.

Does the Church of Christ condemn being gay?  Depends on which one you go to!  The Church of Christ is autonomous and each one can choose what it holds onto in each subject.  For instance, some of the churches have musical instruments and some don't.  Some are liberal and some are conservative.  The one I go to believes that what you do in your personal life is between you and God.  That we are not there to condemn but to come as a body to worship God.

I have some in my church that doesn't approve of my lifestyle, some who tolerate it, and some that approve.  Yet each one of them accepts me as me!  This makes it very easy to deal with being gay in the church.  We teach "Love the sinner, but hate the sin in your own life and when you get rid of it, then go to your brother and help him."  None of us get rid of sin in our own life, not completely, so, therefore, we cannot go to our brother and fix his life.  We can pray for them though!

One of the reasons though that I stay with the Church of Christ though is how can I expect the church to grow to accept gays if I don't stay?  I am involved in helping people understand being gay and what that means.  I am there to show that we are humans too.  I am there for the next person that wants to come along and be part of.  I am there to help the parent of a gay child to understand their child.  If the church is to change, it needs people to be part of, not walk away because it is easier elsewhere.

The Church of Christ has come a long way, but it still has a way to go.  One day, I know it will be a church that gays are not scared to go to!  I will be there to see it happen and I will know that maybe, just maybe, with God by my side, I had a part to play in that!  So this is why I am in the Church of Christ and why I stay!

Tony Campolo's story of a gay son

This is just an amazing video!  I recommend all watch!

Guilt of being a Christian and Lesbian...Is there any?

Can any of you prove me guilty of sin? If I am telling the truth, why don’t you believe me?

John 8:46

Today I got an email that asked a very important question. It was "Please how do you handle the guilt of being a Christian and a lesbian?"  I have been meaning to write on this subject for some time now and just not gotten to it.  I get asked this a lot believe it or not.

I honestly don't have any guilt.  Not from that!  Sure I have guilt in my life, but it stems from sins that are not because I am gay.  I don't feel being gay as a sin.  I have read too many books on the matter and studied too much to believe that it is wrong to be gay.  I honestly believe that I didn't just wake up one day and say "Hey, I think I am gay"  No, I know I was born this way.

Knowing that I came from the womb this way, made this way and knowing that in Genesis 1:26 it says that we are made in God's image, then that means even the gay me is in God's image.  I am not a mistake.  It would be like saying an autistic child is not in God's image when really they are more like God than maybe a lot of us are.

So with this knowledge, I can not feel guilty that I am gay.  Yet that does not say that I can not have the guilt of acting on being gay, so the question is do I?  No!  Not one bit!  Why?  You may be saying, "But Lesley, there is scripture that says it is wrong!"  Is there?  I have studied these scriptures left, right, sideways, and all around.  Read books about them, and come to the conclusion that really it was not the act of homosexuality but the acts of rape and idolatry that they are talking about in them.

Nowhere in the Bible does it actually say, "Homosexuality, the act of a loving committed relationship, is wrong!"  It does say that acts that are of cruel nature, acts that are worshipping other gods are wrong, but not where it is natural for a person to love another and committed to that person.

In 1 John 3, we read of God's love and how we are to love.  I honestly believe that where there is love, then there is God.  Where there is hate, then there is not God.  How then can you explain that a gay couple can flourish and grow who love's God and each other?  Because God is in their life!  I am single, I love God, and since I have come home to the church, pronounced my love of God, and moved forward in my walk with God, He has been evident in my life!  How you may ask?  Well, I have been flourished at work with more sales that increased my pay, got a better living arrangement, got a brand new car, this blog has flourished, and I have been blessed with a slew of new friends.

So no, I don't feel guilty being gay and Christian.  I love that I am both!  I don't have an issue with it.  And I pray for the day when one doesn't have to say "Gay Christian" and we are all just Christian.  Just like I pray for the day we are all just people not straight or gay, but just people.  Till then, I don't mind being the Church of Christ Lesbian plowing through this world one blog post at a time hoping to help others know it is okay and to form your own opinion that there are others of us out there!

God bless you and know you don't have to feel guilty!

Christian Lesbian Dating In A Non-Christian World

Get up, my dear friend, fair and beautiful lover—come to me! Look around you: Winter is over; the winter rains are over, gone! Spring flowers are in blossom all over. The whole world’s a choir—and singing! Spring warblers are filling the forest with sweet arpeggios. Lilacs are exuberantly purple and perfumed, and cherry trees fragrant with blossoms. Oh, get up, dear friend, my fair and beautiful lover—come to me! Come, my shy and modest dove— leave your seclusion, come out in the open. Let me see your face, let me hear your voice. For your voice is soothing and your face is ravishing.

Song of Solomon 2:16-17

I have found it very different dating today then when I dated before I became a Christian.  In the past, I would not care about things like sex, drinking, and so forth.  Yet now I do.  I don't want to just jump in bed with anyone, especially on the first date.  And I don't want to be on a date where all they do is drink up the bar.

I do look for women with similar values and I ask if they are Christian or not.  I get, I believe but I don't go to church or anything.  I get it.  I mean the church has not always been there for the LGBT community.  So why go?  Yet, I want to meet someone that will go with me.  Is that too much to ask?

Today, I meet these women and they seem to be more about when can we have sex then building a relationship.  If that is all it is about, then I am not for them.  I am also not looking for a uhaul date.  I want to build a relationship.  I want a foundation.  

I keep wondering where my person is.  You know, that one that lives a Christian life, wants to build a relationship before jumping into bed, that doesn't find it necessary to get drunk every chance they get, and is stable in their life.  Some one that I can walk beside and support as they do me.

Dating in a world full of the opposite though is tough.  You have to get out there and just meet people and have the time they want to meet at some bar.  Why?  Cause the only place that is truly open to lesbians having a date is the lesbian bar cause there is not a lesbian coffee house.  Or besides online, the only place to meet others is at the bar cause they are not at the churches.

That is the sad thing, you can't meet a good Christian woman at church because even if they are there, you don't know it.  I would love to walk into my church one day and meet the lady of my dreams.  Maybe one day, but today is not the day.

For now, it is online sites with the hope that I can meet someone that is not too out there in the world.  One of the things though that does help, before I reach out to anyone, I pray about it.  I ask God to be involved in the interaction.  If it is to be a good one, then let it be.  I ask that He also let me be a testament to Him and be firm in my beliefs and not falter just cause she is cute.

That is hard.  There are times that I meet someone and they are very beautiful, there is much chemistry and we hit it off.  And oh how I would love to do more then just kiss them.  For goodness sake I am still alive!  I choose not to because I choose to wait till I am in a committed relationship contracted under God.  So I have a choice to make, follow my heart and brain or follow my glands.  That is when prayer comes in, I pray that God keeps me on track.

I have learned that it is easier to date when I bring God into the equation and let Him take the lead.  Those that are not meant to be there for me, seem to disappear.  Those that have some purpose in my life even if not to date, stay in it.  But no matter what I must have God first!